Mad Fucking Deuces On Your Ugly Face

Again, today, not much going on. Woke up at 1pm. Started watching the Bud Shootout. I'm not really too into sports, but I love watching NASCAR, and, watching NASCAR VIA DVR is perfect since not only can you skip commercials, you can fast forward thru caution periods. I prolly wouldn't do this if NASCAR was like it was 15-20 years ago, but, NASCAR throws so many "DEBRIT" cautions, so people can catch up, usually its when fan favorties ar running far back or about to go a lap down, for example, everytime Dale Jr is about to go a lap down, or he gets to running in the Top 5, NASCAR throws a caution for him... So, if NASCAR didn't throw PHANTOM Debrit cautions, I'd prolly listen to the commentary, but, NASCAR throws SHIT LOAD of them.

But yeah, thats how my Valentine's Day eve is going. Slept till 1pm, got up, my GF was still sleeping, headed downstairs with Holly in tow to watch some NASCAR, came up for some redvines a while ago, my GF is now reading.

Prolly hit up the fridge for some leftovers after I'm done in here. Need some snacks for tthe race.

It's gonna be a long season tho, I'm used to watching the races with my dad. In this busy responibility filled world, watching the race with my dad was really the only time I got to spend with him during the week. We would do the lawn on saturday's but thats not downtime/talk time.

The 1st segment of the race is almost over and, it really DOES feel like something is missing.

I miss my mom and dad being out here. It's amazing how spending a few hours a week with them doing something like watching the race was THAT much more awesome than I knew it was.

Anyways, snacks and race!!! At least maybe Holly TheDawg will come watch it with me!!!

Not Too Much Going On...

Inside my head right now, kinda blank today.

I AM getting better at making Pizza and Pizza Rolls. There was a mini empanda/pierogi maker in the house, so i tried using that to make my pizza rolls. First batch I made the dough too thin and some of them burst out through the pocket.


The second batch came out better, left the dough a little thicker, but, because I'll assume I put to muuch filling in, it didn't explode OUT, but the back side that clamps down kinda opened, like a Venus Fly Trap. All but one had the stuff still inside, but, I did kinda like how they opened a bit from the krinkled/seam side for the simple fact it cooled them down a little faster, and you could eat them sooner... and when you get someone whose fat like me, the faster you can shove the food down your gob the better.

Oh, I thought of something I wanted to rant about... I guess I'll save the VTines Day observation till later, tomorrow, or even Monday...

Ok, well, I'm gonna go back to sleep for a little while now. Went to bed late, still tired, plus its Saturday, and, while you would think I'd be doing something TODAY since MONDAY is Valentine's Day and my GF is working, and, you know, tomorrow can't really stay out late since Monday is a work day, there is nothing planned. Well, nothing planned that involves me and my gf getting to relax together.

Not that I can afford anything, but you would've thought maybe just spending a quiet day ALONE would be something, even if I can't afford to do ANYTHING, but, nope.Oh well. Theres always next year.

So, This Is What I Get...

For looking forward to something.

Followed the directions off the Jeopardy website yesterday EXACTLY. I had previously registered like it suggested last week.

I proceeded to try and Login at 730pm like it suggested... but try and login no later than 15-20 minutes BEFORE the test...

Nothing happened.

Tried for 20 minutes.

Nothing.

Decided maybe it was my gf's laptop, so I decided to DL Firefox onto it...

Nothing.

7 minutes to go, I go downstairs and ask her sister to see about trying to get it on HER laptop while now my GF and I were trying to get it on hers....

Nothing.

8 O'clock came and went....

I didn't even get the CHANCE to fail.

This is what I get for being positive and optimistic and looking forward to something. Now honestly, I don't feel like doing ANYTHING.

Currently, well, not CURRENTLY, obviously, I'm floating around the net playing games on facebook, watching a movie called Mysterious Island (Cut me a break, Kyle McLachlen is in it), pretty much just being fed up with everything.

It's such bullshit. Everything.

I'm tired of looking forward to something to NOT have it happen... I've been out here the better part now of THREE MONTHS, and have gotten to do ONE THING I've wanted to. Now, doing "THINGS" of course takes MONEY, but, I have ONLY wanted to do ONE THING that cost any money in 3 months, go to that race at Toyota Speedway, which I didn't get to do. I've been talking about driving to the town at the top of Mt. Baldy, just, as a cool place to drive too... haven't done that. I added wanting to go mail letters from Twin Peaks, as that is close TOO... haven't gotten to do THAT...

I'm pretty much at the point where I'm fucking fed up and REALLY don't want to DO anything anymore. Other than sleep, watch TV, and write while I'm leaving a shit. I was psyching myself up all day yesterday for that test, so I didn't look for any jobs. I had conceded weds cause I woke up late, now today, I have no drive to even begin looking for anymore jobs, cause, well, I'be been doing that for 2 months and 3 weeks now (I relaxed and was sick the 1st full week I was here) and N O T H I N G is happening on that front. I'm tired of spending 3-4 hours a day looking and applying for jobs its CLEAR I'm NEVER going to get.

Like seriously, what's the point of it all? I've been positive for the better part of 3 months being out here, its getting me NO WHERE... maybe being pessimistic and a huge whiney BITCH might get me somewhere. I think I may try that out for the next 3 months.

Anyways, oh, yay, the weekend. What fun... another weekend of NOT getting to do ANYTHING I want to do, which, that first bit was sarcastic, but, honestly, I don't give a shit anymore. What sucks about this weekend is its Valentines Day, and I don't have ANY MONEY yet AGAIN to buy my gf even a CARD for the holiday, so how much of an asshole does THIS make me look like? To anyone that KNOWS the situation, oh wait, thats right, I'm STILL an asshole anyways, but, to anyone that DOESN'T know the situation, I get to be bad mouthed and my gf I'm SURE is being told, "you can do WAY better than that", and maybe thats the truth, maybe upheaving my life and moving 3000 miles ISN'T enough... for some it SURE doesn't feel like it is... but whatever, who cares anymore... I'm done giving a fuck about things for at least today. I earned the right to be a miserable fuck after dealing with the bullshit I have the last 3 months with NOTHING coming to me cause I HAVE been optimistic.

But yeah, I was thinking about an old friend of mine named Jim before. I have him on my facebook, so, we do get to interact quite a bit. But growing up, Jim was one of my best friends. I hated my HS, but I had a few groups of friends, my sports type friends, my band/smart type friends, and, my friends with people like Jim, who, people always looked at cockeyed. Jim loved this tho LOL... he reveled in being a "freak", even if the truth of the matter was, if anyone took 2 minutes to actually TALK to Jim, he was good people. But you know how HS is... people are just concerned with whats on the OUTSIDE and how POPULAR they can be, NOT how someone ACTUALLY is. Jim and I and our group had discussed starting a band at one point. This was my 1st foray into it. Jim and I did jam on a few occasions. One of which I have the tape of somewhere at my old residence, we spent half a day at a studio, it was a blast, Jim went on to play in some bands, cause Jim was REALLY dedicated to being an amazing drummer. He missed a bit of HS cause he actually WAY playing in bands and WAS putting a serious effort into it.

Anyways, when we started discussing this, he was lucky enough to have a 2 car garage in his backyard, and, parents who were cool enough to say, basically let us have it.... with the caveet with cleaned it out. I heard this, and was excited as fuck... what I didn't know was that the garage was LITERALLY packed stupid with stuff.

Flash forward to after we had it cleaned out, admittedly, Jim did most of the cleaning himself, but I did help a good deal with getting furnature in there and moving all the heavy shit out, etc....

But, my HS days, that garage and Jim were 2 of the reasons I CAN look back and actually smile about that time in my life.

We even put down a shitload of plywood in the loft so, we had downstairs for the band, which, than was basically Jim's drumkit and practice area since he was dedicated like I said... brought in some furnature, and, pretty much I spent every NON baseball season day there getting drunk, and, most days AFTER baseball practice there... getting drunk. Good times. lots of friends, lots of fun fun experiences. I have alot of stories about the garage, but, I wanted to tell a story about Jim that always gets me laughing, and, right now a smile and a laugh is REALLY what I'm looking for.

One of our friends in this group was named Tom. Tom was hot and cold. Some days Tom was cool as fuck, other days, he was just a huge self centered asshole, weather anyone else felt the same, I COULD prolly opine on this, but I won't. But, there would be like days where Tom would have no problem letting me ride on the handle bars of his bike as we went 2 towns over to get pizza, but other days, he would just act like he thought he was better than everyone. Anyways, Tom lived across from our HS, literally, and, most days we'd go to his house for lunch and get drunk, or, if we were looking for a different place to chill after school for a bit, we'd go there. As if you didn't guess, most days I was at Jim's. Tom was sketchy, some days he'd come some days he wouldn't. But, during the day, if he had a break, he was at his house. I'd suggest this is why Tom and I got along so well, Tom I think more than I did back then "GOT" the "fuck these assholes, I don't care what anyone thinks" mantra way better than I did. He didn't really associate with anyone too much... So whenever I was off, and knew he was, like I said, I'd be over across the street for 30 minutes or so getting fucked up, cause, well, honestly, the majority of the people I went to HS with, you HAD to be fucked up to deal with there assholeness.

Anyways, one day I see Jim wandering the halls between periods. I didn't get to Jim's before school to get drunk, and, Tom who I had what I believe was English early in the day, I had a few classes with him, wasn't around. I had known they were chilling after school the previous day doing whatever, I couldn't as I don't really rememeber the exact reason, prolly baseball, maybe just doing a report or some shit, IDK, don't hold me to it, so I grabbed Jim coversed with the regular sup pleasentries and such, and than I asked him where Tom was... this is how the conversation went, and this is one of my best memories from my HS time...

"Hey Jim, I need to get a few drinks in me, you seen Tom, he wasn't in class, I know you guys were doing something after school yesterday."

"Yeah, we hit up the pizza place than went back to Tom's afterward to play some genesis and such"

"Cool, what time you head home?"

"well, heres the thing about that. Tom was being a Mr. Browntone dick, and we kinda got into an arguement. We wound up outside somehow, we were outside talking and such, and, decided to start fucking around out there. I wound up throwing a pitchfork thru his foot"

"Wait what? You threw a pitchfork thru his foot? cmon, your bullshitting me dude."

"no. I did. We were fucking around and, I wound up throwing a pitchfork thru his foot"

"wow, thats sad. Kinda sucks that happened"

"Yeah it was sad, and it did suck, cause I was actually aiming for his chest. Anyways, catch you later man"

And with THAT.... Jim took off down the hall towards his next class.

Man, I miss the few really good friends I had in HS. I miss all the people I was friendly with in HS. They really made it bearable. Thank god for people like Jim.

THIS... IS... JEOPARDY!!!!

Well, not RIGHT NOW... but tonight. It will be interesting to see what kind of questions are on that prelimenary test later. One of the things I'm interested about that, I'll never get an answer for, is, I wonder if its the same 50 questions for everyone thats doing it, or, its like the S.A.T.'s where they have a few different tests, or even to the extreme that each test is unique, even in that they have the same questions but in a different order, IE Question #1 for me might be someone elses Question #27.

Should be interesting. I'll make sure I write about it in the 1st entry afterwards since I'm SURE people are waiting with baited breath. Still kinda sucks that they don't tell you your results after the test is over, I would've liked to have had a definitive result as opposed to, well, I THINK I got THIS MANY out of 50 right....

I don't really think I will get a good enough score to get to the 2nd bit, which is being invited in to take a second 50 question test in person, but, my gf and her sister were saying that I should do it, and, to Jeopardy's credit, the prelimenary test, the make it easy for people like me who are concerned about weather or not they would be embarrased if they got on TV. Honestly, if you can pass the multitude of tests they have set up to actually GET to the point that your on an episode, honestly, I looked at the people who look stupid on that show differently now.

I almost WANT to get on there.... so they can be like.... An Unemployed Man from the Inland Empire who mooches off his GF and her sister.... than go on to be like.... and heres bill, a rocket scientist with a doctorate from MIT... and heres sally, she holds 2 masters is anthropology and works at the Smithsonian....

Pretty entertaining eh?!?!?!

So let me pass on a story, I seem to have forgotten that aspect of this venture, you know, writing in this Blog... while I'm... "Blogging?" Mainly I feel like I've been a whiney bitch lately, but, I guess you write what you know LOL.

Back in High School it's fair to say that I was a very good baseball player. My dad to this day seems to think if I made the effort to actually you know, go to college, I could've played in the majors. Personally, I feel I was exceptional, but, the majors? HIGHLY doubtful. Thinking of people who played in the Majors when I would've, I don't think I would've had the balls to get in a batters box against the likes of Randy Johnson or Mitch Williams, you know, people who had little or not control over 100+ MPH baseballs being thrown near my face. Not that I was scared to be hit mind you, but, I don't see myself in front of 60k people trying to get a hit off the big unit. That being said, after HS, I did play Semi-Pro ball for 4 years. I played in leagues that weren't scouted or whatever, I say Semi-Pro, cause, they weren't weekend warrior type leagues, but NOT "professional"... And in these leagues I played with some people, please don't ask me to name names, cause, honestly, I don't remember, and none of these people went on to be anything of note ANYWAYS, but, I played with some people who were either playing, played, or on their way to playing professional minor league baseball. Like I said, none of these people never MADE anything of themselves, IE... OH I played against Derek Jeter when no one knew whom he was.... But, I still played with people who wound up getting paid money to play baseball, and I feel I held my own very well.

Now, after getting off on that tangent, which, why its germaine to whatever IDK, but, back in HS, I played baseball. My Sr. year, I had the least amount of classes I could POSSIBLY take. This day and age, you can't do shit in HS like drop subjects, back when I was in HS, after you took your 2 years of Math and Science, you weren't REQUIRED to take them... So, my Sr year, I dropped Math and Science, and, the 2nd half of the school year, I was going in for third period, and didn't have a 9th... but since baseball was on, getting to leave school at 2pm or so wasn't that cool of a thing cause, I had practice at 330 everyday. After baseball ended was prolly some of the best days of HS for me... I was getting to school for 945 and leaving at 2. I hated my HS... not so much the HS Era TIMES, but, I HATED my HS. It was filled with fucking assholes and douchebags mostly. Did my best to just blend in and only talk to my friends, because watching people and how they acted always made me sick... heres a side story....

This guy named Tim who was a year older than me in my HS, was BMOC, you know, Big Man On Campus. Sports hero. Real cocky arrogant, A-typical "jock" you hear about in those movies. Like Peter Facinelli in Can't Hardly Wait is the one example on the top of my head. Anyways, you know the type, real bully... there is a scene in the TV Show Freaks and Geeks where the A/V teachers explains how the a-typical HS jock "PEAKS" in HS... he goes to college where hes a failure... he graduates... hes a failure... than hes pumping your gas while your rich.... back to this story, Tim was ALL THAT and more. NO ONE really liked Tim, and, whats funny, I went to a TINY HS, Tim was mediocre at everything he did. IE he was TRYING to be the "Super jock" he thought he was but, what he didn't know was how EVERYONE in school didn't think he was a loser, but KNEW he was a loser. I know when I played baseball with my my Jr year, when he was a Sr, EVERYONE on the team laughed at him behind his back, cause he thought he was superman, but his .210 batting average and the fact he made an EXTREME amount of errors told the REAL story.... When I inquired about this, all I ever got was... well, you don't PLAY football, your in the band, so, you watch the 1st half of every home football game, Tim is a joke, everyone knows it, and if you watched the games, you would too... Same with my friends who played basketball, my grade had some great basketball players, guys good enough to play and excell in college, but the best player in the school was a grade below us, this gay kid Dave, and, I happened to be friends with one of the guys in my grade who was excellent, we used to play one on one, my friend Rob used to beat me like 100-5, which isn't saying much since, well, I SUCKED at basketball LOL... but he always used to talk about during my jr year when we'd hang out that if Tim didn't SUCK, and passed the ball instead of missing pretty much every shot he took, they would've done better than they had....

So, you get the correlation here... Tim's World vs Reality.

SO, back to Tim. Tim was the a-typical example of a HS Jock, but, one who wasn't ACTUALLY skilled at sports. Now, what makes Tim WAY more pathetic than OTHER HS jocks? He NEVER LEFT my HS. When I say this, I LITERALLY mean, my HS was 7-12th grades, so from the time Tim was in 7th grade (age 12?) till THIS DAY... he hasn't gone ONE DAY without being at the HS i graduated from. Tim is now 37. thats 25 YEARS living his "HIGH SCHOOL" Glory... why? cause he would be a FAILURE if he actually had to go away from my small little home town.

Now, I know what your saying... huh? How could Tim do this??!?!?

Let me explain.

When I was a Jr. and Tim was a Sr, Tim's Girlfriend was a SOPHOMORE. Nice girl actually, she was a bit slutty, she kinda would fuck anyone, but, regardless, she was a REAL nice girl. Tim treated her like you would expect a BMOC to treat her. I had her in one of my classes, and I used to over hear her telling her friend who sat behind me about how much of a dick Tim was and how badly Tim treated her. I didn't "Get" why she stayed with him if he was a dick till WAY later in life.... Anyways, Tim was a Sr dating a Soph. Tim proceeded to graduate. Tim, if you haven't figured this out yet, stayed LOCAL for college. So, my SR year, Tim's Freshman year in college, his GF's now JR year in HS, Tim was at my HS everyday to pick up his gf. I graduated, but still had some very good friends, that I'm still friends with to this day, still in the HS. I didn't see them as much as you would imagine after I graduated since I was going to college now. I stayed local cause, honestly, I had NO intention to even GO to college, but, I went to appease my mom and dad, in hindsight, and I always tell my mom and dad this, I WISH I would've TRIED, cause, in HS i NEVER got higher than a 67 in English, my 1st year in college, I had an AWESOME teacher, and wound up with an A... after THAT I was CONVINCED that it wasn't ME who was stupid, but just that the teachers were HORRIBLE... I shouldv'e realized that during my Jr year when my english teacher spent the FULL YEAR doing "Hamlet"... anyways, back to Tim... I still had friends, I'd run into them everyonce in a while when I was out and a bout, and one day I proceeded to inquire, in a joking manner weather or not Tim was STILL dating his GF and if he was at the HS everyday picking her up....

What do you think my response was?

In a serious manner...."How did you know?"

I laughed and was like, well, what's Tim gonna do NEXT YEAR, shes a Sr now, and, he MIGHT actually have to face the fact hes a fucking loser at college, he went from being "Super jock" to NOT playing any sports in college, cause, well, he DID actually suck, he MIGHT actually have to face the fact he can't be the BMOC at a HS forever.

So, years went by, I went about my life, I moved out of my small town for 3 years, to which was AWESOME, didn't really see too many people around. Started working for the heartless drug chain, to which I started seeing a bunch of people I went to HS with... at this point, you would think I was embaressed about working a shitty job and seeing these people... normally I'd say you were right, but what I had going for me? I looked COMPLETELY different... shaved head, goatee... people who I went to HS with would come in and ask...Don't I know you? Didn't we go to JS together? To which Id'd reply, no, I'm not from around here, and would say I went to the HS and lived in the area my than GF did... The only people who KNEW me, even tho I looked 100% different, are people I realized later were ACTUALLY my friends..... So, people that recognized me, we'd chat for a few minutes while I checked them out, or, I'd take a few minutes and helped them shop. It was nice.

One day I had it in my head to ask about Tim..... It turns out that when his GF graduated, sometime AFTER the prom, and, BEFORE the start of the NEXT school semester, Tim broke up with his NOW GRADUATED GF.... and started dating... a girl from our HS that was starting her JUNIOR YEAR... So Tim, now a Junior at a local college... was dating a Junior in HS.... and wouldn't you know it? Tim would go back to the HS EVERYDAY to pick her up....

Tim proceeded to date her while they were both juinors in HS and college respectivly, than when they were SENIORS in college and HS RESPECTIVLY.....but NOW.... what was Tim to do... his current GF was graduating... Tim was SHIT out of luck trying to find yet ANOTHER girl at the HS to date because, well, being 22 now, and, HIS juniors being 15-16... that would almost make Tim look like a Pedo....

So, what does Tim proceed to do?

Oh yes... applying for, and GETTING a teaching position at the HS... This I found out because we wound up hiring a kid who went to my HS but was WAY younger than me... He told me MANY stories about Tim, and said, he was a huge asshole who did things like... put on pads in football practice, YES, Tim NOT ONLY was TEACHING AT THE HS, BUT Tim was COACHING SPORTS.... but he'd put on PADS... and PLAY and SCRIMMAGE with the HS students in practice... Tim, in his mid twenties, running around in FULL PADS, playing Football with the HS kids during practice....

But I heard many stories like this about Tim from this kid I worked with, and, was honestly amazed that Tim proceeded to NEVER be able to let go of HS and being the BMOC.... how pathetic is a person who does that?

tim to THIS DAY, still works at the HS. Prolly not realizing that even the kids there NOW think hes as big a fucking joke as the people who WENT to high school with him 20-25 years prior....

The sadest part of this story tho is, Tim married that 2nd girl, has kids with her. I wonder if she ever realized how she was used to get Tim those 2 years of glory.... whats even SADDER... Tim was allowed to reproduce. Tim was a fucking scumbag NO ONE liked. It's amazing to me that someone can be SO BLIND to the truth, and someone can be SO PATHETIC that at 37 they are STILL trying (and succeding) in living up their days gone by.

This kinda went on and on, and I didn't get to tell my story about chucking up a full box of Mac and Cheese under the gym bleechers one day during indoor baseball practice... But its important to share stories about people like Tim... WHY?

Cause people like me in HS weren't INFORMED of how pathetic people like Tim are. Maybe the smart kids KNEW, maybe the outsider kids KNEW... but I didn't know that people like Tim, their life PEAKS in HS... and they proceed to do WHATEVER THEY CAN the rest of their lives to spend each and everyday TRYING their best to RELIVE those days... Tim found a way to do it. And that to ME is way more pathetic than the HS Jock who DOES get that moment in life where he realizes hes pathetic, u know, that day where their pumping the gas into a nerd they beat up in HS's Rolls Royce.... They "GET" how pathetic they and their existance is. Tim will NEVER "GET" that, and, thats just sad....

Anyways, off to walk Holly LOL...

Quick Update

No job hunting today. A friend of mine redid my resume, so, I'm gonna start using that one starting tomorrow. Plus, I got up real late, and, getting up real late is gonna be a bitch for getting up early tomorrow. I really wish someone would contact me for a job out here already. It's getting kinda ridiculous. It will be 3 months I'm out here saturday, and, I haven't been offered ONE JOB. With all the applications I have sent out you would think I'd get SOMETHING by now.... I guess that 12:1 people applying to job ratio is way more killer than it even looks.

I guess if I look on the bright side... at least I haven't needed to ask to borrow money from anyone yet... Still have my emergency money, AND, at least I can maybe borrow against what I'll get back from my taxes which should get me thru another month.

This would be so much better if I actually was ENJOYING the fact I'm not working... But I'm not the type that does. It's UBER fucking depressing. Even days like today, and prolly tomorrow, I'll take off from looking, it's depressing as fuck to not have a job.

Anyways, off to walk Holly. At least I'm being productive THAT way....

Holly is cool, she has her own facebook BTW. Holly TheDawg. LOL she doesn;t like having her picture taken, so, yeah, there should be more pictures of her, but they would be of her ass walking away when I was trying to get a good picture.

Ugh, I Need A Shower

Man I SMELL like azz. I need to shave and shower, but, I'm getting to the "What's the point of it all?" state of mind fast, so... I mean, what's the point of it all?

I just realized today, I have YET to do a wash since I moved out here. Ill be here 3 months next week. Don't really know what that says but, its a fact. Don't really NEED to... not out of clean clothes yet... yeah... I've gotten to do THAT little since I've been here.

Santa Ana winds are blowing up a storm tonight. It's actually pretty relaxing with the window opening listening to them.

Had some leftovers for lunch. Plus I made some more mini hot dogs. Not too much left in the way of leftovers from sunday. Might have some more after I finish in here. Trying to decide weather or not I should take a shower tonight, later, or tomorrow, or even THAN.

Maybe I'll chance having some iced cream too tonight. I kinda wish it was tomorrow cause than tomorrow I'd be taking that Jeopardy dealie. But I'll have to wait till tomorrow before I can say, Yay, tomorrow I'm taking that Jeopardy test.

I think I'll go get the mail after I'm done in here. My mom and dad told me last saturday that they were mailing me some stuff sometime soon. I'm looking forward to that. Maybe my parents found me more Boo Berry cereal!! I DO Still have 3 boxes left. I need to stretch them out till October when places liek Target stock it for 2 weeks and I can restock. I want to make Boo Berry treats again. they were tasty!

I enjoy cooking. If I win alot of money in the Lottery I think I'll open a resteraunt and cook good food for people. I can do something like In-n-Out and All American Burger do. Start with a limited menu. But when I start to cook something that turns out good add it as I go along. Start a website that people can visit while they are waiting for their food and take suggestions about stuff to prepare!!! Than decide weather or not I can prepare it well enough to sell. It could be fun, I could get my mom and dad to come help once my dad retires, force my GF to work as the hot hostess that dudes gawk at and keep coming BACK to gawk at... and force friends and family to work there when they visit or just u know, force them to work there LOL.

Oh man, being backed up is filling my head with all sorts of CRAZY ideas.... I'd say it never hurts to dream.... but it does

Another Boring Day...

Man, hitting my head back in the day really has fucked up my memory. I had a good topic to discuss here today, but, I seem to have forgotten it..... Speaking of seeming to forgotten it... Fidellio....

Hm, interesting, the bathroom STILL smells like hot sauce. I came in here last night and when I was expunging and writing I noticed that (previous to anything being unloaded) that it smelled like hot sauce or something. It still does in here. That very odd.

Looking forward to lunch and somemore left overs from sunday... gotta get em finished LOL... the food was good, can't very well just like let it rot and go to waste now can I?!?!? I felt bad enough throwing out the extra pizza dough i made, but I left it in the fridge too long while I was cooking sunday, and, it got all hard and didn't look in anyway edible anymore.

I miss my last job. I for the first time in my life understood what being proud of your job felt like. Add on top of that, working with really great people... I miss being there. I hate being out of work, you know, it's not so much the lack of income coming in, which kinda sucks, but, I enjoy being productive. I;m sounding like a broken record I'm sure, because I've prolly said this before,

But I miss the people I worked with, they were all good people, and ALL unique in some way, and, spending time in the lunchroom or the few minutes waiting to punch out to hear stories was really a good time.

Anyways, maybe I'll start making notes about what to discuss while in here from now on. I distinctly rememeber having a topic to discuss or relay when I got in here at THIS time today, last night, but, meh.... now I seem to have forgotten it... but, I HAVEN'T forgotten the password for admittance... Fidellio.... but in this case, I SEEM to have forgotten the password for the house....